Category Archives: Music

Regret me not

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**work in progress**

 

I’m not sure if it is possible but I try it anyway. Living with little regret is difficult enough, but living without regret is damn near impossible.

C’est la vie! Carpe diem!  YOLO! Yada, yada, yada .Another thing I am unsure of is if those who coined these phrases have any regrets themselves. I am pretty sure that those who actually got YOLO tattooed on themselves will probably regret it one day, but you only live once right?

It is much easier said than done to not have regrets. If you are a product of the 80’s the Aquanet is probably regrettable. The ’90’s gave us frosted hair. Speaking about fashion what things will be regretted from this day and age? Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments!

The best part of breaking up

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The best part of breaking up

Might be Folger’s in your cup. Rediscovering yourself is always the best part. Reclaiming music you couldn’t listen to while grieving is a close second… it made you happy before damnit! This does not happen overnight so until then here are some steps I know I take to get to that point.

Being a chick it is more acceptable to be emotional so if you have anything you need to say to your former beau feel free to knock a couple back, let loose, and blame it on the a-al-cu- alcohol it’s already done and over with so what do you have to lose?

Make an ass out of yourself. Let loose. Dance like a fool. Be “that guy or girl” who screams “THIS IS MY SONG” at the bar. It’s best to do this at a place you don’t plan on frequenting anytime soon and make sure if you decide to use alcohol as an excuse to have a designated friend to drive you home and tell you that you look marvelous even when you’re hugging the toilet.

Make a playlist. Use music to express how you feel. If you want to feel like less of a sap go for some thrasher metal. Also remember there is no shame in listening to Toni Braxton and wanting your heart to be unbroken. If your ex is a complete tool, might I suggest some Lily Allen. Also, if they are a tool it makes getting over them a lot easier!

Remember why you are dateable in the first place. Tell yourself it will be ok. Or if you are still in sappy mode, get a pep talk from one of your friends. Listen to some Gloria Gaynor and know that you will survive! Get all spiffy looking and flash a really great smile at someone. Chances are you just made someone’s day by making them feel good about themselves too!  Even if you feel awful at least you look pretty fly.

In the age of social media it is pretty easy to find someone who feels like you do. Misery loves company! I know when I’m in a foul mood for whatever reason the last thing I want to hear about is how happy someone else is. So find a friend, follower, or “friend” who is also having a bad day/week/year and have a pity party. Have a few pity parties. Have several pity parties.

Do something for you. Take a mini roadtrip. Get a haircut. Splurge on that album you’ve been dying for. Go for the top shelf stuff. Even normal liquids can feel more high class out of a wine glass and if you want to feel like something super special you could even put your pinky out! After all, you deserve it!

Above all take care of yourself like Kai the Homeless Hitchhiker said: “No matter what you’ve done you deserve respect, even if you make mistakes, you’re loveable. And it doesn’t matter your looks,your skills…” and so on.  Even Honey Boo Boo’s mom found someone!

Don’t Judge a (Face)book by it’s Cover

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     What’s the first thing you do when you add someone on Facebook? You go through everything they have. Don’t lie,we all do it. What kind of embarrassing photos do they have? Who are they dating? What friends do we have in common? Do they prefer Pepsi or Coke? After all that then one can make stupid judgments on them.

     Although social media brings people together it also tears them apart. I think the best example is showcased around election time. I am guilty of posting pro- my views stories on Facebook as much as the next person so I can’t really knock anyone for doing the same. What I did find however is that I was beginning to look at my “friends” and friends differently.

     Those I am close to in reality a lot of the time had views that opposed mine I didn’t even know existed. Even more remarkable than that is the fact that we interacted quite frequently and rarely if ever the disagreements came up in conversation. 

I have an eclectic group of friends. Hippies.  Metal heads. Gays. Straights.Crookeds. Neo nazis. Republican. Democrat. And everything in between. I may not agree with everything they stand for or against but if I judged them on their beliefs what kind of person would that make me? What it boils down to is respecting differences.

                Even if we think we know someone upon meeting them you really don’t know them until you LISTEN to them. In life and on Facebook, I’ve found that rather than making comments and discouraging those around you listening to other people’s stories and views is far more enlightening than shoving beliefs at them.

                After you check out everyone else’s deep, dark secrets of Facebook look at your own. Going back to the beginning of my page brought back plenty of good memories, embarrassing photos, and trying to figure out who I was dating when I was “in a relationship” was quite a struggle. Figuring out why I dated some of them was even more difficult. Hindsight is 20/20 so go easy on yourself when strolling through your memory lane!

I’m so Moving on Yeahhh

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I’m human. I get sad, angry, and so on. I think one of the worst things I do is doubt myself. I was hesitant about using this as my essay for getting accepted to my school choice but figured “Why not, this is me. Unapologetic and honest”. After five weeks of waiting, being me paid off. Even if I suck at plenty of things like relationships, math, physics and a million other things at least I know I got to where I am by doing it my way.

While talking to my academic adviser /life coach/ professor, Ed Ackerman about my anxiety of moving away from my current location I brought up another one of my assumed faults: being impatient. Ed just smiled and said “that’s the charm about you, that’s how you get things done”.

So if patience is a virtue, and I do not have patience I am not virtuous… at least in that aspect, but at least I get things done.

Getting accepted in to Arcadia or any four year school has been a dream of mine for a long time, and now I can say I’ve accomplished that. Taking everything in to consideration I’m still scared shitless. Let’s be honest, I do enjoy being close to my hometown, but there’s nothing for me here. I like going outside of my comfort zone, changing up routines, and having a good laugh whenever possible.

Here’s the essay I submitted to Arcadia:

The main reason I want to attend Arcadia is to separate myself from the depression of living in a once flourishing area. Sure in the heyday, Northeastern Pennsylvania was one Hell of a place to live but now it’s filled with one dead end job after another.

I won’t say that living in the Wilkes-Barre/Hazleton is all bad. Most of the people are very hard working, and drinking neither of which are bad in moderation. Both of my parents are highly motivated and passed on that gift to me.

The borough in particular that I live in is your typical small town. You cannot so much as take your trash out without someone seeing you and forget making a last minute grocery store run in your pajamas. I swear as soon as the neighbors know you are not dressed to impress everyone from your second grade teacher to your ex best friend’s cat groomer knows you went out looking like a mess.

I want to be able to go “grocery shopping in my pajamas” so to speak, and such a populated area so far away from the place I have called home most of my life, Arcadia University will allow me to do so.

I know I am one of very few registered Democrats in the quiet suburb that is Conyngham. Everyone acts so entitled because they married someone with a strong Italian last name or one of the political talking heads that have yet to be busted for corruption. As for me, I live and let live. Who am I to judge what is wrong and right when I myself am finding out the difference between morally “right” and what the “good book” says.

Aside from that, the amount of narrow minded beings that live in my general vicinity is downright absurd. Immigrants are not to blame for all of the world’s problems but many think they are. The saddest part is that most of them are immigrants themselves.

Upon my travels up and down the East Coast, I found that not everyone thinks so negatively. Maybe I am just a big fish in a small narrow pond, but I look at my education, journalism background and Arcadia as my way out.

Also, the fact that because I am a Phi Theta Kappa member and I get a hefty scholarship makes the burden of paying for my schooling a bit easier.

Story stub in progress…

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                I’m not sure if it is possible but I try it anyway. Living with little regret is difficult enough, but living without regret is damn near impossible.

                C’est la vie! Carpe diem!  YOLO! Yada, yada, yada .Another thing I am unsure of is if those who coined these phrases have any regrets themselves.

You Can’t Always Get What you Want… but if you try Sometimes…

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Life has a funny way of making that very clear to me.  Maybe Morgan Freeman said it best in Bruce Almighty when he rattled off something like “when we ask God for strength does he just hand it to us, or does he give us opportunities to be strong.”

I for one am one of those people that if something is “too easy” there has to be something wrong. As time has gone on, I realized that the “easy” times are the silver linings to a hectic thing called life and to not take them for granted.

No matter what, I am always going to have the complex of “too good to be true” but after the newness wears off and the blinding gold flakes off, nothing is perfect.

Never did I think that at 20 years old I would be engaged to be married. I also didn’t think that a month later I would be single. For a while I thought that would be the emotional death of me and for a week or so that was true. Then I got over it.

Some dream of the Hollywood romance a la “The Notebook” and Disney movies, and wait around for their literal or figurative prince charming. Are there many women out there that would really fight for love like that? If you have to fight for it was it meant to be in the first place?

Sure there were signs my relationship would not work out but I just wanted so badly to have the “happily ever after”… but that happens at the end of the story and I’m not even close to being finished with my accomplishments.

I look at it as the higher power’s way of proving to me just how strong I am and that he wasn’t my Prince Charming.

“The best part of breaking up is finding someone else you can’t get enough of.”- Liz Phair

Even though I think I don’t need anyone… deep down I want someone who laughs at my stupid jokes that I can call “mine.” In the meantime I’ll continue doing my thing and focusing on other things I think I need… like another shade of red lipstick.

Not literally but…

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     So December 21st. Who else is afraid of the world to “end”? I’m actually pretty excited. I don’t believe in the literal sense of a huge explosion or the world falling in to a black hole… but I do think that very soon the way of life we’ve become accustomed to is about to end. 

     Our country is much in it’s infancy. Most other places have gone through several revivals, highs, and lows. To be honest we are way overdue for such a change.Voter ID laws bring up a certain nostalgia for me… like poll taxes and lynchings. Remember to vote in November. Educate yourself on the issues and be aware of the changes to come.

     I think the middle class (myself included) will be ok after the social changes take effect. We know how to do without, substitute, and clean our own houses. It’s the elitist, super rich I’m worried about. Every dog has their day I guess…

A boring English Assignment…Made Interesting

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A Reality Show Star is like the Bearded Lady in a Freak Show

            At some point we have seen the drunken reality star antics displayed on Jersey Shore, The Real Housewives of New Jersey, and The Bad Girls Club. Whether we like to admit it ,or not, the shows are a guilty pleasure of young, old, and every demographic imaginable. The adage “happy news doesn’t sell” is completely personified in these shows, by bar fights, scantily-clad females, and characters who can best be described as train wrecks. Sideshow performers, namely the bearded ladies, also catch attention for the same reasons. All things considered, a reality show star is like the bearded lady in a freak show.

            While the resemblances are much easier to see, there are a few obvious differences. In order to be a reality show, you do not need to have a beard, or be a bearded lady for that matter. Reality stars make more money than bearded ladies because they have more outlets for their “talents,“ whereas a bearded lady is usually confined to the stage.

            Differences aside, the similarities between these two subjects are staggering. These two types of people are always under public scrutiny and in the middle of an actual or figurative spotlight. When there is something that distinguishes a person as being “different,” everyone’s attention is focused on them .For the bearded lady, a literal spotlight is on them while performing on stage, after the show, people’s attention is still constantly drawn to them. Reality stars and their escapades get leaked to every National Enquirer-esque magazine, and no move they make goes unnoticed. Countless reality television shows are dedicated to the ridiculous nature of people. With constant flash bulbs, paparazzo follow a reality star’s every action; whether it be a trip to the mall or getting arrested for being drunk on a beach in New Jersey.

            Both bearded ladies, and reality show stars are intriguing due to the novelty of their nature. Someone else’s misfortune is always interesting, because it makes us seem more desirable, and more normal than them. Bearded ladies are amusing because they take social norms of women not having beards and smash it to pieces. Think of it as The Jerry Springer Show’s appeal; when one views the program the urge to suddenly feel better about personal life decisions is nearly impossible. Snooki finds herself getting sucker-punched in a bar on Jersey Shore. Maury has a woman trying to find her “baby daddy” for the sixth-time. With any of these instances, one can not help but stare and wait for the antics to peak for our personal enjoyment.

            The lifestyles of the bearded lady, and reality stars both involve traveling, demanding work schedules, and untraditional means of getting a paycheck. Additionally, both types of entertainers surround themselves with like-minded people. A circus performer travels from city to town, and back again to promote themselves in a group of taboo people. They do not  have normal nine-to-five jobs, and work late in to the night. Those who star in reality shows travel to promote whatever their talent is, go to parties, and hang around with their co-stars who do the same. A bearded lady is most comfortable with her circus freak show co-workers, and a hot mess reality star is most at home with their cast mates.

            Neither the bearded lady, nor reality stars are ever taken seriously for the very same reasons. When people look, or act outside of what we deem as appropriate, they are immediately written off as unintelligent. In this case, the novelty effect pushes them farther away from society, and a stigma is placed upon them.  The bearded lady fits in with her circus freak show counterparts, but does not function well when placed individually within society.  A bearded lady could never really get a traditional job, because they capitalize upon only one facet of their being. The cast mates of Jersey Shore only showcase the fact that they go to the gym, go tanning, do laundry, and they are reckless drunks. A  bearded lady, or Snooki, for that matter be accepted as a school teacher, doctor, or even a custodian. Both reality stars and bearded ladies chose a way to get a paycheck that limits their options if they decide to leave their current career,

            In summation, the similarities between a bearded lady and a reality star outnumber the differences between them. A reality star can not be taken seriously, because they have ostracized themselves from what we see as a functional person, and neither can a bearded lady. To feel comfortable with their actions, both subjects surround themselves with other “freak show performers,” and they both use taboo actions to gain attention. We look at these people not as intelligent human beings, but as their orange-tanned, part-going alter egos, or as a woman who defies the facial hairless standards of females. Whether it is a traveling circus, or publicity tour reality stars and bearded ladies put themselves on display all over the world and open themselves up for public scrutiny. What one can gather from these conclusions is both subjects are not so different at all, and bearded ladies may not seem as taboo as their stigma; they just do not make as much money.

You Think You Know…but You Have No Idea

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You think you know… but You Have No Idea.

                This is the diary of a poor college student. True Life: I Got screwed out of financial aid. These are the documentaries MTV should be making. Does it adversely affect my life when Kim Kardashian puts out another sex tape? Not particularly, but it is entertaining. We look to the mishaps of celebrities to make us feel better about our lives.

                When I see the “real” housewives spending more on a car than my associate’s degree costs, I get a bit sad. When their kids complain about having to get a job, I can’t help but want to toss my television out of the window, but I can’t. If I break something I have to buy it or live without it. That, and my television is a 100-lb behemoth and I would probably re-break my back if I attempted to throw it out the window…but maybe it would fill in the giant potholes in my driveway. Anyway, you get the point. I don’t have a flat panel or anything too extravagant, but I go to school in hopes that my higher education will begat a higher paycheck.

                I tend to write about being a poor college kid a lot, because it’s what I know. I don’t know how to be an extravagant millionaire but I bet I’d be just darling at it. And because I had that much money I could say things like “darling” with a fur coat on and cigarette holder a la Breakfast at Tiffany’s in my hand (they are about $34 online in case you’re wondering.) If I ever got to that point, I only ask that someone slaps the hell out of me. I would like to use a word more severe than hell but this is a family-oriented blog!

                All I want to do is have some fun, and I got a feeling I’m not the only one. Props to Sheryl Crow, because I think that is all everyone wants to do but until you pay your dues that is  just a dream in the near future (unless you go to be a doctor or marry rich.) Well, I don’t have the patients to be a doctor (yes I spelled it that way intentionally), and I only plan on getting married if my life is threatened or something out of Beetlejuice is happening. I have to pay my dues.  That means college. That means pending the equivalent of two weeks of my pay on books for one semester. That means selling back my $150 physics book back for 1/3 the cost if I am lucky. By the way if anyone needs a physics book let me know I won’t charge you $150 and we can barter!

                I am not the sharpest of students when it comes to certain subjects (math…physics…ect) but I know what I would like to do for the rest of my days or until it stops being fun and that is writing. Two years and almost $10,000 later I got off cheap. Compared to other local schools I went to the bargain bin of college and probably got a better education. Community college professors do not make a lot of money. More than I make but still not a lot. What can we draw from this? Oh, they actually want to be there to teach because they sure as hell aren’t doing it for the money. Which means for the students, they get a better education from a community college than from, let’s say, Penn State and the community college credits transfer almost anywhere.

                I am 20 and in debt. $6,000 in debt. Gasp! It must be from credit cards! Well, I did have some credit card debt, but it was for my $400 in textbooks, but that is paid off. Not to brag, but I’m going to do it anyway, I had a 3.9 last semester and I live by myself. I work a full time job and a part time (career) job to pay for gas to take me to class so I can get a better career job full-time that does pay my bills. I do, occasionally, have a life though. Those wild nights usually end by 10:30p.m which is earlier than I go to bed when I have studying to do.  

Thanks to the federal government I will probably get little to no grant money for school. Why? Oh, my parents make too much money. Yes, that is there money they earned. They should not have to pay for me to get a higher education.  I don’t want a handout but I thought the government was there to help.  Here’s where the feds say I went wrong: I decided to go to college straight after high school. I am not married. I am not pregnant (thank god!) and I did not already have a child (no 16 and pregnant here.) If you are under 25, unmarried, and without spawn you generally get little to nothing if you’re parents are( gasp!) middle class. Myself and my parents pay a higher percentage of taxes than well, a Kim Kardashian type.

Reality stars whine more than most people I know. I just got mad because I ran out of s’mores  Poptarts (store brand but still phenomenal)! I have become used to having them for more than breakfast: 1. Because I am not a morning person and nothing in the wee hours of the day make me happy and 2. They are cheap and easy (again I’d like to make an inappropriate joke here but I can’t.) In the grand scheme of things what can I or anyone else in my situation do? Either party for seven years after high school then start college or stick it out and hope for the best. I’ll go with the latter.

Email to my Writing About Literature Professor

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The assignment was to write at least a paragraph on what you decided to write a six-page research paper on. It is too nice to go to class so this is what I sent:

Trish Reznick

Professor Walker

Eng 104

3 April 2012

               

 

“I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.”

“If all the girls who attended the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn’t be a bit surprised.”

“If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy.”

Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren’t lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.”

 

                Even by today’s standards these quotes are a bit risqué. Think back to the 1950’s and they would resonate a lot more, but to be honest these were uttered by Dorothy Parker in the 1920’s. Obviously she lived by her own rules, but how and why did she feel this way? By looking at some of her written work, and also her biographical notes I will try and make excuses for Parker and her sometimes purely awful sense of humor. I feel it is necessary for me to do this because, my parents and friends have been doing the same for me for many years.

                If I can find a reliable source, I will try and find out just how Parker feels about life, love, and writing using direct quotes. I think the best way  to go about this is to read her works firsthand, and since she is highly entertaining, I won’t mind at all.